Fear of Old Age

SWAMI ADISWARANANDA

(Continued from the previous issue)

(4) Practise Non-dependence. As people get old, they begin to become dependent on others for support and care, and this causes them fear and anxiety for their future. 'Who will look after me when I become old and cannot function or work?' is the universal concern of the elderly. They live in constant fear of being neglected, forgotten, and abandoned by their family members and friends.

Vedanta asks us to practise non-dependence in all matters. The wisdom of Vedanta says that all dependence brings misery and non-dependence alone is happiness. Practice of non-dependence from an early age makes old age less vulnerable to fear and anxiety. Non-dependence has two aspects: physical and mental. Physical non-dependence calls for maintaining good health by following the laws of health: diet, exercise, conservation, relaxation, and moderation. Our body, when neglected, abused, or defiled, becomes a burden and a cause of worry in old age. Another component of physical non-dependence is material non-dependence, without which a person is forced to live on the charity of others. It is the duty of a family man to make provision for his family and for himself so that in old age he will not be at the mercy of others or even dependent on them for favours.

The other aspect of non-dependence is mental. Mental dependence takes the form of emotional dependence on friends, relatives, people and things. Humans perceive the world through the eye of emotions. Their actions and reactions are guided by emotions. They are bound together by the tie of emotions. Emotion is the vehicle of self-expression, one of the basic urges of human life. When people cannot express their feelings of love, affection, and sympathy, they feel suffocated and live a miserable life. They are heavily dependent on receiving emotional satisfaction from others. Emotional dependence becomes acute when they get old. As in the case of the practice of non-attachment, practice of emotional non-dependence calls for transferring our dependence to God, knowing that God alone loves us and cares for us. Prophets and saints tell us that it is a mistake to expect any support from the human world. Human love is mostly guided by selfish motives, and dependence on such love brings nothing but disappointment. The more we are able to depend on God, the less will be our dependence on others. Dependence on God, however, does not come by itself. This requires deepening our God-consciousness by practising prayer, meditation, and dispassion. Those who are not inclined to follow these practices are advised to develop the habit of reading books, writing, painting, or playing musical instruments, etc., so that they can keep themselves occupied, have emotional satisfaction, and be non-dependent.

Even world-renouncing monks and ascetics are advised to practise non- dependence. The laws of physical decay and disintegration are universal and they do not exempt anyone. When the body gets old and begins to break down, it drags the mind down to the physical level. A weak or sick body demands more attention of the mind. Practice of prayer and meditation becomes difficult even for a monk when his body is taken over by old age ailments. Small wonder then that in old age a monk begins to feel the chill of dependence. Unless his self-surrender to God is unshakable and his faith in God's caring hands is unwavering, he becomes fearful in old age. Instructing a monk, Swami Saradananda, a direct disciple of Sri Ramakrishna, said the following: 'It is good to be active, but it depends on several factors. Your health must be good and you must be able to get along with fellow-workers. But suppose you have injured one of your limbs; then it would be difficult for you to do work. Therefore I request you to cultivate the habit of reading. Even that is not enough. Suppose you become blind. Therefore it is good that you also practise meditation so that if you cannot read or work, at least you can meditate.'¹² Activity should not be the sole spiritual preoccupation of a monk. He should keep up the habit of intense study of holy texts and the practice of meditation, so that when he is no longer able to be in the field of action he can be totally non-dependent and spend his old age in study and contemplation of the Divine. The goal of a monk is to be a monk, not to become an administrator, a preacher, a lecturer, or a scholar but to be a man of God, and in his journey to that goal he is alone with his absolute dependence on God. For a monk who forgets these facts, old age brings not enlightenment but disappointment, frustration, and fear.

(5) Do Your Duties and Do Your Best. Vedanta says that life is interdependent, not independent. Our individual life is sustained by receiving support from others. Our body is reproduced from the parental cells. Our food is gathered from the vegetable and animal worlds. Our individual mind-stuff is derived from the cosmic source. Many have to suffer and many have to die to keep us alive. The human, superhuman, and sub-human worlds are bound together by a tie of spiritual unity. Therefore we have duties to others--duties to God the Creator and the sages, to fellow human beings, to the vegetable and animal worlds, to parents, and to departed ancestors. By doing our duties we recognize that bond of unity and overcome our selfishness and greed, and attain to peace and tranquillity. Receiving and giving are the two aspects of living. When we were born, we received help from others for our growth, support, and development. When we grow up, we are expected to repay our indebtedness to others by doing our duties to the best of our ability. Those who do not or cannot repay are forced to live a miserable and demeaning life, and their old age is haunted by feelings of self-defeat and unworthi- ness.

(6) Contribute to the Welfare of Others. One of the cardinal teachings of Vedanta is that all existence is one: there is one Self that lives in all; there is one life that pulsates in the whole universe. Each individual is like a leaf of a huge tree. Leaves grow and fall in their due time, but the tree continues to exist. When we ignore the fact of oneness, our individual existence becomes separative and delusive. Because of the oneness of existence, our individual welfare depends upon the welfare of the totality. Thus, by doing good to others we really do good to ourselves. We experience the joy of self-expansion. Swami Vivekananda says: 'They alone live who live for others, the rest are more dead than alive.'¹³ Self-sacrifice for the good of others is the highest virtue. The Bhagavad Gita (II.40) designates this virtue as the greatest dharma: 'In this [selfless action] no effort is ever lost and no harm is ever done. Even very little of this dharma saves a man from the Great Fear.'¹⁴ There is an ancient verse that says: 'Since death is certain for the body, let this body be used for the good of others.' According to the Bhagavad Gita, the doer of good is the best among the yogis (VI.32): 'Him I hold to be the supreme yogi, O Arjuna, who looks upon the pleasure and pain of all beings as he looks upon them in himself.'¹⁵ Further, the Bhagavad Gita (VI.40) says: 'O Partha, there is no destruction for him either in this world or the next: no evil, My son, befalls a man who does good.'¹⁶ Our selfless actions for the good of others help us to break down the walls of our separative existence, and bring us in contact with our ageless true Self. This contact with our true Self puts an end to all our sorrows and sufferings.

(7) Develop Self-awareness. Vedanta reminds us again and again that our true identity is our ageless spiritual Self, the essence of being and the Consciousness of consciousness. This Self uses the body for gathering experiences. While the body, being material, undergoes change, the Self remains unchanged. Science has proved that human organs are interchangeable and replaceable. The physical body is produced by the combination of gross elements and consists of flesh, blood, bone, and other substances. Dependent upon food for its existence, the body endures as long as it can assimilate nourishment. Non-existent before birth and after death, it lasts only for a short interval between birth and death. One continues to live even after particular parts of the body have been destroyed. The body is no more to us than what an automobile is to its owner. The ignorant identify themselves with the body; the book-learned consider themselves a combination of body, mind and Self; but the enlightened see the Self as distinct from body and mind. By our identification with the body, we suffer its destiny--the sixfold change: birth, subsistence, growth, maturity, decline, and death. Vedanta urges us to overcome our identification with the body by heightening our Self-awareness through regulated practice of meditation on the Self.

(8) Keep the Goal in View and Move Forward. Practice of Self-awareness endows us with Self-Knowledge. Vedic sages tell us that life is a journey toward Self-Knowledge that alone can guarantee freedom from all fear. Self-Knowledge is not our choice but our very destiny. There is no rest and no peace until we reach this goal. Through our pain and suffering, sorrow and disappointment, birth and death, we are journey- ing toward that knowledge of our Self. When our journey toward that Self is conscious and willing, we call it spiritual quest, and when unconscious, forced by circumstances, we call it evolution. When we deny this Self, we confront It as endless pain, suffering, old age and death. Self-Knowledge may be chimerical to those who are entranced by the glitter and gewgaws of the world; but for the seekers of Truth, Self-Knowledge is of supreme value, the greatest and the grandest achievement of life.

Concluded

Notes

12. From a reminiscence of Swami Saradananda by Swami Nikhilananda in Glimpses of a Great Soul, by Swami Aseshananda, Vedanta Press, Hollywood, California, 1982, p.243.
13. Teachings of Swami Vivekananda, Advaita Ashrama, Calcutta, 1971, p.259.
14. The Bhagavad Gita, translated by Swami Nikhilananda, Ramakrishna-Vivekananda Centre, New York, 1978, p.84.
15. Ibid., p.171.
16. Ibid., p.174.